Through my travels I was over-thinking. "AM I doing it right? AM I "letting go"? AM I being in the "Now"?"
Simple answer? No. I wasn't.
I simply wanted to STOP the programming of my past and see what I was without it!
So Thankfully I was guided to go and sit in silence for 10 days and not look at anyone
Genius.
It was there that I learnt the Art of Vipassana Meditation.
Now if anyone asks my about Vipassana, I LOVE IT and it is the Greatest Ten Days I spend every year.
However, through the first training I wanted to rip my skin off and tear my eyes out because every horrid thought I had been programmed with, about myself or others, rose to the surface and it felt like I was in Hell :(
ALTHOUGH before you cancel your retreat booking...
The Buddha is not WORLD known for nothing, right?
The technique is ASTOUNDING!
I came back with no cravings, a silent mind, a still heart AND SELF LOVE!
I hope you are celebrating with me! I released my old programming of "Poor little old Emily" and I accepted what I was...
ATOMS!
Yep, it has been that simple all along.
I was a bunch of atoms, vibrating millions of times per second and if I thought bad stuff my atoms felt low and if I aligned to higher truths like "IAM Atoms" then my atoms vibrated faster and basically were having a better time. Simple!
No Government Official had ever Broadcast this in the House of Commons.
No Head Teacher had ever stated this clearly in our DAILY assemblies.
My own mother had not known of this delicate Truth so she could not tell me!
NOT EVEN a Trained Counsellors" told me this when I was trying not to kill myself.
Cringe, hey?
From that moment on I knew that "no man in a uniform" would EVER tell ME they were in charge of me BEFORE OR UNLESS they proved that they understood Quantum Physics!
(If he did then we would both forget the charges and then have a cuppa tea..:)
Fast forward and within 2 years of giving birth to my daughter and separating from the father, I had Followed My Passion!
I had Qualified as a Meditation Teacher, set up a high street location and was sharing all the beautiful wisdom that I had processed and embodied over the past 30 years of suffering to others seeking to Free themselves from the Matrix!
Go Me and Go Us ALL
It was sweet!
But as I began asking myself how more I could help people, more came through...